When Pustule Face Called Us Fuckers

So the incoming Biden deputy chief of staff called us Republicans fuckers.  Aren’t we all fuckers at some point or another?  Has she not fucked?  I imagine not, with that pustule face she must bear.  Biden preaches unity but says nothing about this offensive unfuckable fuckface so I must bear the burden for us all myself. 

So you want to call republicans fuckers because you think it makes you cute or allows you to finally fit in with what you see as winners?  Oh, far from cute you are.  Did you think Glamour talked to you because you’re glamourous?  I would laugh but you’re pitiful and my empathy forbids it.  Your pasty white face is actually quite hard to look at.  It’s so horrible to see that it conjures up nauseating memories of that first beach trip of the year.  The sun, sand and subtle wind are so soothing after a long, cold winter.  Out of nowhere, desecrating your peace, your eye catches sight of an obvious beer drinker pulling off his winter’s white pot-belly-covering shirt and there it is!!  His hidden, telling gut of shame!  So offensive and in broad daylight!  There it is, your place in our world… the passing fart in the wind of a should be hidden foulness of pastiness, a bulging horror to eyesight.  No offense intended to potbellied men, of course.

You, so ugly inside and out, are the epitome of visual offense.  Please pull your shirt up over that thing you call a face, so reminiscent of potbellied offenses.  One could go so far as to call it a fuck face, as surely no man would be so desperate as to kiss such a pasty-ass white visage.  He would surely make use of that thing with body parts located farther from his mouth.  Sort of like the joke about hookers not kissing on the mouth.  You are like the ugly kid in the restaurant showing your ass thinking you’re cute because you have terrible parents who let you think it.  You are the purest example of ugly is as ugly does.  Often, inside such a horrible carcass you might find a great, kind person underneath; but you wear both your inner and outer ugliness for all to see.  You spewed what you thought was an inside joke against at least 75 million people and therefore stirred more ugliness in a world so full of it.  A world full of ugliness and full of shit these days. You are the face of that shit now, so you shall be named Shitface until the stench of you fades.

This isn’t Gossip Girl, and you’re surely no Serena.

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